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Rodogirl
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posted 21-10-2009 @ 01:59 PM
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Violent domestic attack
Saw a guy in a supermarket carpark today lay a good punch on his partner/wife/whatever and put her out. Very disturbing. Tried to find security but
none to be seen. So just Called police. By the time they got here he had bundled her in their car and raced off. Have given them numbers of car but
still feel very freaked out. Never seen anything like it - so violent.
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frunue
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posted 21-10-2009 @ 06:41 PM
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How horrible for you to see something like that. Some men are real basta*ds. I know from past experience(unfortunately).
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suzy74
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posted 21-10-2009 @ 07:57 PM
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I hope that through your efforts Rodogirl that the police catch him and charge him. What a low life.
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kelster200460
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posted 21-10-2009 @ 08:02 PM
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I once heard a man walking up a main street yelling at his wife/partner, slapping her over the head and kicking her as they walked. She was crying and
so were the 2 young boys - aged around 3 & 4 - following a little way behind them.
There had to have been 10 men on that street that had seen and heard what was happening, but no one did anything, except stared.
When they got closer to where I was, I stepped up and glared at him as he walked on by. I could smell the alcohol stink on him, it was 10 in the
morning. He didn't even notice me standing there.
When the lady got close to me, I put a hand on her arm and asked her if she'd like me to call the police or give her a lift where ever she'd like to
go.
She looked at me, tried to swing a punch and went on to colourfully abuse me at the top of her voice on how I should mind my own business.
Then kept walking up the street.
As a 23 year old my heart broke for those kids who were shaking and crying still.
What can you do? I still wish I'd grabbed the boys and taken them to the police or something, anything to get them away from that scene. It's such a
sad situation that people, women & men, allow themselves to be treated this way & their kids, by angry, sad, pathetic partners.
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Islandboy
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posted 21-10-2009 @ 08:14 PM
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Its a hard call, what to do???
Cops probably always arrive to late, Kelster you could had ended up a victim as well. Sounds like the poor woman and kids are regular victims.
Just hope that woman's OK. You probably won't hear anything unless she presses charges and they need a witness.
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keanas-ma
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posted 21-10-2009 @ 08:43 PM
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How good of you Rodogirl there should be more people like you in this world.!! I remember when I was little my mum went into a service station to buy
my dad smokes and he came in after her broke her nose, Gave her black eyes and bet her to a pulp and no one done any thing at all  (It was not unusual for her but some help would have been nice for once) Good
on you and kelster200460 too. Some people are such pigs and not just men!! xxxxxxx
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kakadu
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posted 21-10-2009 @ 09:30 PM
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Good on you babe!!!
I came across a bloke roughing up his girlfriend in an underground carpark - she was quite small and I'm 5'10 so I told him to man up and see if he
could take me on instead....LOL.... he swung and missed and I decked him with a well aimed backhand - I don't know what I was THINKING.... ahhhh! to
be 21 and full of courage again!!! 
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Cass
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posted 21-10-2009 @ 09:46 PM
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One of my best friends was in a very violent relationship but I hadn't ever seen anything personally until one night we were out with her workmates
and he took offense to her talking to one of the guys she worked with, he was right in her face about to hit her so I stood inbetween them and told
him that if he hit her again I would rip off his Balls and shove them down his throat.....he never hit her again, weak little man stopped as soon as
he was challanged.
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suzy74
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posted 21-10-2009 @ 10:23 PM
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www
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| Quote: | Originally posted by Cass
One of my best friends was in a very violent relationship but I hadn't ever seen anything personally until one night we were out with her workmates
and he took offense to her talking to one of the guys she worked with, he was right in her face about to hit her so I stood inbetween them and told
him that if he hit her again I would rip off his Balls and shove them down his throat.....he never hit her again, weak little man stopped as soon as
he was challanged. |
Good on you Cass - what a worm - I would have loved to see it. 
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Cass
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posted 21-10-2009 @ 10:37 PM
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lol I was young too, must be a 20's thing
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prizenetta
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posted 21-10-2009 @ 10:55 PM
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When I saw something similar happen I was sixteen and invincible of course!
I went to the aid of a young woman not much older than I was, and ended up being punched in the face by a grown man
I told him his mother must be so proud of him, then he cried 
I think I was lucky he didn't hit me again!
I couldn't believe other adults just watched.
This woman was curled up on the floor and they did nothing!
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missmuffet
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posted 21-10-2009 @ 10:55 PM
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Well done Rodogirl, wish there were more people around like you. I remember one particular public hiding I was getting and not one person helped. I
actually got yelled at by a family for upsetting their kids and another family told us to take it elsewhere! Thankyou for doing the right thing.
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enchantedspirit
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posted 21-10-2009 @ 11:04 PM
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my son stepped in once when he saw a girl being abused by her partner, all alcohol related. I had just arrived into town to pick him up, the male
partner belted into my son who had slipped in the rain I ran I put myself in between them shielding my son lying on the ground the guy didnt stop I
was screaming at him (I ended up with a lot of bruises) my son lost half a tooth and four others were chipped, the woman who was being abused was
standing their screaming, we managed to get to our car and I said to the girl get it Ill get you away from here, her boyfriend was kicking the car by
this stage, she wouldnt get in. My heart etc was beating so fast I thought I would have a heart attack.
We will think twice before we intervene again. Ill just call the police next time. I shake now when I think about it. We found out later the couple
are notorious for domestics and the police are regularly called to their house as they smash windows etc when they fight and neighbours are sick of
it.
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kismet
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posted 21-10-2009 @ 11:45 PM
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I know it feels like the right thing to intervene as decent people, but look at Brendan Keiler in Melbourne who was shot & killed going in to
defend that exotic dancer from her boyfriend who was punching her. In my opinion she put herself there in that situation with that lowlife and a
decent, upstanding man with a wife and children lost his life needlessly and the Dutch backpacker nearly lost his too. Nothing was achieved here.
If I were Brendan's family I wouldn't be able to get over that & the woman involved I would be so ashamed that I had partly caused it. Choices,
choices, choices.
I think of their family often.
I am fully aware of the difficulties women have in abusive relationships and the myriad of reasons that they either choose to stay or have not a lot
of choices but please if yopu see this sort of thing in a public place by all means take licence #'s, ring the police etc but DO NOT INTERVENE in the
midst of violence.
Good on you Rodogirl for giving a toss and being alert!
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born2comp
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posted 21-10-2009 @ 11:53 PM
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Rodogirl would have been awful for you to have witness that abuse of that woman.You did the right thing ringing the police.
Over 10 years ago,I use to work for an agency where I lead and co ordinate support groups.These group were for women and children who were victims of
Domestic violence.I was in the job for nearly 6 years,heard alot of sad stories.been threatened by some partners few times where police had to be
called.Had some kids I was working with in a seige with their Dad, for approx 18hrs..
It was very heart renching as to how low women'self esteem can go as result of the abuse they had suffered.Whether it was verbal, physical,
emotional.Yet good to see so many women that worked with, become empowered and life that was free of abuse.Our agency ran groups for men who were
perpetrators of violence.Some men turned their lives around and stopped the abuse.Learnt what was triggering it and learnt to communicate with
partners without abuse.Alot of men went back to old ways, yet some years later hear that relationship is still going and like a new man.Our agency
copped alot of flack in the 90's for even contemplating running such a group for men.Alot of people see Domestic Violence as low income families.Yet
over the years I saw women who partners were highly qualified jobs and own businesses.You just dont see these women being abused in the streets by
their partners,it happens behind close doors as trying to keep a lid on it.So less likely to report to police as feel they have alot more at stake.
enchantedspirit, would have been very scary for you and son you were very fortunate to get away.Not good about son's tooth and chipped teeth, and
your brusing could have been alot worse.
Always best to ring the police and not intervene.As hard as it is at time.There is alot of help available nowdays, support groups, refuges,
counselling.
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melvass
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posted 22-10-2009 @ 12:57 AM
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| Quote: | Originally posted by kismet
I know it feels like the right thing to intervene as decent people, but look at Brendan Keiler in Melbourne who was shot & killed going in to
defend that exotic dancer from her boyfriend who was punching her. In my opinion she put herself there in that situation with that lowlife and a
decent, upstanding man with a wife and children lost his life needlessly and the Dutch backpacker nearly lost his too. Nothing was achieved here.
If I were Brendan's family I wouldn't be able to get over that & the woman involved I would be so ashamed that I had partly caused it. Choices,
choices, choices.
I think of their family often.
I am fully aware of the difficulties women have in abusive relationships and the myriad of reasons that they either choose to stay or have not a lot
of choices but please if yopu see this sort of thing in a public place by all means take licence #'s, ring the police etc but DO NOT INTERVENE in the
midst of violence.
Good on you Rodogirl for giving a toss and being alert! |
Couldn't have said it better kismet
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griffin
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posted 22-10-2009 @ 03:31 AM
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Heard big fight some years back down the road, lots of yelling, shouting, thumping noises, & sounded very threatening to the wife.
Called the police the next day to say what had happened & he was now at work & maybe they could come out & see the wife to see if she
needed any help, or was she ok? They (bliieve it or not) said maybe I coud go & talk to her .................... didn't want to risk it tho.
Thought they were really slack & useless, said to them, that maybe they'd do something afterwards if he killed her.
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pinkyeeyore
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posted 22-10-2009 @ 03:38 AM
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Sorry to say that the police will not do anything unless the lady makes a complaint. I saw a lady being really beaten in a carpark. We got the rego
number and went straight to the police station. They said there is nothing they can do about it unless she makes a complaint which they said she
probably will not. The knew the man and the family but said that there is nothing they can do about it.
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luckaholic
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posted 22-10-2009 @ 06:01 AM
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| Quote: | Originally posted by pinkyeeyore
Sorry to say that the police will not do anything unless the lady makes a complaint. I saw a lady being really beaten in a carpark. We got the rego
number and went straight to the police station. They said there is nothing they can do about it unless she makes a complaint which they said she
probably will not. The knew the man and the family but said that there is nothing they can do about it. |
Thats just sad as alot of abused women are too scared to call police or to leave. I was in a relationship where after the first 2 weeks I wanted to
leave. Wasnt until 8 months later that I somehow got the guts to leave. Dont want to go into detail but I did end up contacting police as him and his
girlfriend were threatening me, and it ended up turning around and I was the one who got into trouble. Thankfully charges were dropped after going to
court many times, but ill never forget or get over what I had to go through all just from contacting police.
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Rodogirl
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posted 22-10-2009 @ 01:57 PM
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This experience hauning me. Wished I could have done more "on the spot" but was no match for this huge angry man. These days people ARE scared to
step in because if someone can have so little regard for a 'partner' what would they do to a stranger? And, as people have posted, we all know what
happens to good samaritans who DO step in and try to help sometimes.
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jody2385
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posted 22-10-2009 @ 08:31 PM
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the thing that is sad about this and why a lot of people dont step in is some women are so weak minded and have no self esteen that they take it but
allways stay or go back i dont understand if a guy ever hit me i would be staight out that door
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luckaholic
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posted 22-10-2009 @ 08:49 PM
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jody if youve never been in the situation, its hard to know really what you would do. Beforehand I would of been the same, but somehow I just couldnt
leave. He made my self esteem that low that it made me think I couldnt do any better. I still suffer depression and low self esteem and that was 8yrs
ago now.
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jody2385
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posted 22-10-2009 @ 08:52 PM
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very sorry to hear that i have never been in a situation like that but i just dont understand how if some one is trying to help you why the one
getting belted would abuse the helper dunno weird world when it comes down to it
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keanas-ma
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posted 22-10-2009 @ 08:56 PM
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I like you jody would never stay if a man hit me and for the life of me didnt understand why my mum stuck around when she'd had every single bone in
her body broken, Honestly I thought it was sick but I guess some people are just too scared, (my god I would shake at the thought of my dad coming
home ESPECIALLY if he was drunk, Which was nearly always!) Its a mystery to me why the woman stay maybe they know what would happen if someone so
violent found them....... I hate to think and get so sad to see families living like that but you cant take them away if they wont leave , Very sad
xxxxxxxxx
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missmuffet
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posted 22-10-2009 @ 10:41 PM
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| Quote: | Originally posted by Rodogirl
This experience hauning me. Wished I could have done more "on the spot" but was no match for this huge angry man. These days people ARE scared to
step in because if someone can have so little regard for a 'partner' what would they do to a stranger? And, as people have posted, we all know what
happens to good samaritans who DO step in and try to help sometimes. |
Of course it is, because you're obviously a caring person. But what you did was the best. I wouldn't expect a stranger to jump in either, but
acknowledging the situation and acting the way you did will hopefully help immensely.
Nothing worse than feeling as low as low can be and complete strangers turning their backs or ignoring it. Makes the worthlessness more of a reality
if someone you don't know can look at you getting beaten and make that decision that you are not worth the trouble.
Chin up, with a bit of luck your action may result in her taking action to get out of this situation and that is the best we can hope for.
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